"Love rules the world". Everyone knows this statement and all lovers agree with it. What are the ingredients of love? For some this is strong friendship, for others it is romance, there are people for whom support comes first. But without which there is absolutely no love: that is sex. We are grown-up girls and boys and we are not going to talk about the fact that there is platonic love and it happens that without sex everything is fine with people. No, it's not like that. If you are over 14, it is unlikely that love without sex is right for you.
Sex is an action when partners are having fun, when they realise their fantasies and desires, when it is good for two. What to do when one of the partners 'goes cold' in bed? Namely, a woman? Just yesterday she was a tiger in bed and the downstairs neighbours were banging on the radiator to make you cooler in bed. You have never ceased to be amazed by her inventiveness of places to have sex. And today he turns away from you and falls asleep. Or says: "Not today".
What to do if a girl refuses your intimacy? Does she not want to have sex or does it seem to be forced? After all, sex is so good. Or maybe you have a frigid woman? In this article, we propose to address what's going on with your girlfriend and why she doesn't want to have sex?
Reasons not to have sex if you are in a relationship
We initially discover that if a woman rejects you for sex, the problem is most likely in you. So let's find out together what you have done and what you can do to make your sex life shine in the same colours.
The woman is stressed
We all live in a very active, dynamic and ever-changing world. We live in time: work at home. And if your partner still has children, then work, cleaning, cooking, keeping tidy, checking classes, transport to schools/schools and back are also added. Not surprisingly, with such a pace of life, it is quite difficult to live. And we all get tired. Therefore, stress in today's life has become the norm. Naturally, when a person is exhausted and tired, the last thing they want to do is have sex.
WHAT TO DO?
First of all, you need to talk to a woman. Sometimes you just have to listen and feel sorry for yourself. Or maybe you should dump him and take some of the responsibility? Then your girlfriend will not be so tired and the things she used to do alone will be done 2 times faster. As a result, she will also be twice as strong and there will also be more time for sex. Or maybe you just need to take a break and go somewhere to relax? If you cannot immediately allocate 7-10 days of rest, we suggest you go somewhere for the next weekend. A change of scenery is also a good cure for stress and an aphrodisiac for vibrant sex.
You renounced relationships
As a rule, a hunter's instinct only kicks in in men when he conquers a woman. That is, in the period before first sex, well, or at most three months later. Then, when you are already in a relationship, the romance disappears completely. Everything becomes simple: I wanted sex - undressed - I got it. For couples who have been together for a long time, the situation can be even more critical. And where is the young man with whom you started a relationship? Where are the flowers, the romantic dinners, the walks together? Men, if you can't remember the last time you gave your beloved flowers, gave you a nice present or spent time together in some restaurant, then you shouldn't be surprised that your woman has cooled off sexually towards you.
WHAT TO DO?
At least once every few days, do something nice for your lady. What exactly - we have written a little further up. If you forget to do it, set a reminder on your phone.
- Difficult to communicate with each other
If your whole life consists of eating together, living in the same area, watching movies and going shopping once a week, don't be surprised that sex has disappeared from your life. Women are designed in such a way that they need to 'talk'. They are very happy with common interests. When you are sincere about something, do you talk to your woman?
WHAT TO DO?
Sit down and talk frankly. Maybe your woman is not happy about something, or maybe she is offended by something. Either way, unspoken complaints are sexual desire killers. You can discuss your problems and come to a compromise together. After talking, the woman will realise that you are not indifferent to her feelings. And attentive men - very much like the fairer sex.
How long has it been since you changed anything in bed? Are you a fan of some favourite poses? Or perhaps your whole sex life only takes place in the marriage bed and that's it? A woman, however, like a man, can get bored of monotonous sex. And if she likes the 'cavalier' position, that does not at all mean that she should only have sex every day in this position.
WHAT TO DO?
Ask her what she would like in bed? How would you like to diversify your sex life? If she doesn't have an answer to this question or is shy, start experimenting. Try to surprise her. Change position, change rhythm. You can try role-playing: a patient and a nurse, a stewardess and a wayward passenger, a secretary and a boss. Or maybe you should watch an adult film together? If you are open to sexual experiments, no woman will be bored with you. And you will hardly ask yourself, "why doesn't a woman want to have sex?"
So, a short conclusion, why is your woman cool to sex. And what are the actions of the man she is in a relationship with in this case.
- Talk to her. Be as frank as possible
- Work on relationships. Remember that relationships are like a plant. It cannot wither in a day. But for it to bloom, you have to invest in taking care of it every day.
- Have sex in various ways: gently and violently.
- Don't stop at 'I don't want to'. Do whatever it takes to feel "I want you".
- Be a man, show your sexual desire.
You are not in a relationship and she does not want to have sex
Although the hero of the famous film was only able to find out what women want by mastering telepathic abilities, in fact, the fairer sex is not as mysterious as commonly thought. Wise nature organised it in such a way that girls are primarily aimed at relationships and procreation. Simply put, you offer her a cup of coffee and she is already inventing names for your future children. Therefore, despite the moral freedom that reigns now, many girls do not have sex with casual acquaintances. That is, the reason for refusing to have sex is the absence of these same relationships.
However, you should not despair. Wise nature itself has given men a whole arsenal of all kinds of tricks that, surprisingly, actually work and help persuade the lady they like into a crazy night of love:
- Alcohol is as old as the world and tried by many generations.
- Philosophy of love - reasoning about the importance of sex.
- Sexual seduction is a gradual process involving tactile contact during courtship.
- Frank's proposal - In some cases, it is very effective to ask directly if the girl wants to have sex.
- This, of course, is far from a complete list of ways in which enterprising men convince their chosen ones to have sex. But in some difficult cases neither works. What is the reason?
- They exaggerate their own importance.
You like a girl, you seek her out, you indulge all her whims, because she is important and dear to you, but she refuses you sex. Here you have to understand if she is that good and you have mutual sympathy? If the sympathy is mutual and she refuses intimacy, then this is at least strange. And if there is interest only on your part and she refuses sex, then that is logical. Women like confident men, they want to feel 'like behind a stone wall'. And the man who indulges all her whims is a very strange character.
WHAT TO DO?
We need to look into this problem. Go to a psychologist or attend a self-esteem course.
The phrase 'I don't want to' stops you
We are not talking here about the fact that if a woman rejects you, then you must achieve your goal by all means. And in no case do we encourage violence. It is just that women often act inconsistently. Their 'no' does not always mean 'no'. Sometimes 'no' is 'yes'. It is testing you. How you're going to get there and do that. Maybe your stories about friends and how close you are to them, and how you discuss events in your life, stop her. And she's afraid you won't talk about your sex with her.
WHAT TO DO?
Woo a woman. They love it. But! Please note that "woo a woman" and "throw yourself at her feet" are absolutely 2 different stories. If the men they get are associated with knights and heroes. This is the second group of men who throw themselves at their feet: they are only associated with weak and strong-willed men. And such men-women do not love. And, consequently, they do not want to have sex with them.
If you are a good man, a gallant gentleman, open the door for a woman, give her your coat and move a chair when she sits down - that's great. Most likely, such a man will really like the mother of the girl he is dating. But the girl next to him, for some reason, does not want to have sex. The answer, most likely, is that a woman does not see a man in such a gentleman. He is a great friend, brother, but does not provoke sexual desire as a man. A vivid example is Knight Mormont from the 'king of the friend zone' in the legendary TV series The Iron Throne.
WHAT TO DO?
A man who acts like a man. And in addition to his education and good manners, to show more qualities inherent to the male sex. Leadership, self-confidence, constancy in one's decisions.
Reasons for refusing sex, not dependent on a man
But for the sake of justice, we want to say that there are situations in which her partner has nothing to do with a woman's sexual cooling down.
Whatever the ideal relationship, full of passion and spiritual unity, the times when a woman refuses to have sex still come. Sexologists and psychologists identify several of these reasons why no one should be blamed. These are the reasons why it takes time to wait for this 'sexual break'
- Feeling unwell. We are all human and there are days when we experience physical discomfort. This may be due to gynaecological aspects, or it may simply be a cold or the infamous headache.
- According to statistics, about 30% of women are terrified of getting pregnant. It is OK if the partner is also worried about unnecessary consequences after sex. Ideally, if both sexual partners compromise on this problem and find it. If the entire responsibility for contraceptives and consequences lies with the woman, it is not surprising that she does not want to have sex. Sex should bring pleasure, not headaches and fear of consequences.
- Self-satisfaction. This is how women are organised; if they do not receive compliments, they start looking for flaws in themselves. And 200 grams, which they have accidentally marked - to them in the mirror they look 10 kilograms heavier. Wrinkles on the abdomen, a breast size that does not correspond to desire or a scar after surgery: all these 'flaws' can serve as reasons why women refuse sex.
- Depression or stress. These are 2 'killers' of sexual desire. During depression, you don't want anything, let alone sex. And during stressful situations, your brain and your physical desire are 'sharpened' for absolutely other factors and not for fun.
- Taking hormonal drugs. It has been scientifically proven that in today's pharmaceutical industry there are numerous drugs whose side effect is a decrease in libido.
In conclusion, I would like to say that if the woman you are in a relationship with or you yourself have such a woman and you have lost your sexual desire, then this is not a reason to panic. This is an opportunity for analysis. It might be worth analysing your life or relationship with a partner. If you can see for yourself the 'root' of your problem, that is wonderful. Make every effort to normalise your life and also your sexual life.
If it is impossible to see what the problem is on your own, seek help from a psychologist or sexologist. Nowadays, there are such specialists in every city.